I seem so slow

There is no Shangri-la. Well, to be honest, I think there is, but it is not our destination as universal fractals. Our destination is not a destination as we understand it. It is within each of us and we are already there. It is not a swoony place like Shangri-la. Because of that it can be easy to miss. It is subtle and, like Dorothy discovered at that end of “The Wizard of Oz,” we are already home. We always have been.

Our minds have been deeply programmed to believe in hierarchies and ideologies, like Shangri-la. Bigger, better, out there, up there, reach & strive for, you’re not it – something else is. Hollywood has played a big part in the programming. We are always looking for bigger, better, out there, sexy, candy.

Years ago I was a participant in an online money mindset group coached by a 28 yr old woman named Laura. It was a humbling experience to be Laura’s student. I was in my 50’s at the time. It took me a minute to alter my mindset about age and wisdom (ha). Laura coached on shifting & releasing limiting inner thought-programs about money and having that shift materialize in the outer world. She understood something about the nature of money that I desperately wanted to understand, but could not quite grasp. The nature of money seemed so set in stone to me.

I felt like young Helen Keller in the movie, “The Miracle Worker,” I saw as a child. As many know, Helen Keller was deaf and blind. In the film, Helen’s teacher, Annie, tries to teach Helen sign language. She furiously makes signs into Helen’s hands hoping she will connect the strange hand movements to the real-world objects they represent, like water. Helen just doesn’t get it. Until… one day she does. By some grace she makes the electric connection that the weird hand movements are a language that Helen finally speaks.

When Coach Laura used to speak about her money insights I felt like Helen before she understood signing. It was just beyond my grasp. Lately, though, I’m starting to get it. It is dawning. It has been many years. I feel slow! It’s about life being a dream and choosing which thoughts, feelings and accompanying sensations we entertain. But first, we must confront the painful beliefs we think are real. As that emptying occurs, there is a freedom to choose. We can choose better stories about money or anything else.

This might sound like positive thinking or affirmations, but it is not. It is about emptying out the life-illusion and embracing the charged “bits” inside ourselves enough to see that this is a game and we are not bound by any memory, history, ideology or identity. Positive thinking can be a big defense mechanism. You have to know yourself well enough to discern how you are using it.

Up until the time we start to experience more choice, we live in ideologies, identities, memories and believe them, often wholeheartedly. Not a problem. If you believe something is real how can you also not believe it is real? It is an evolutionary process.

Two other wise women I work with know that our Universe is benevolent. It’s not a belief for them, it is something they know. I feel slow here too, but am starting to trust it. I still have my moments when I’m pretty dang sure the universe is out to get me, but there is more space around that lately too.

If it is true that the universe is friendly by nature, then I am free to accept alternative interpretations about life and life events. There have been alot of so-called negative life events the past few years, but that too is a point of view.

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