Category Archives: Bravery

Disrupting

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The solar generator suddenly started taking in half of what it is supposed to and half of what it was taking in just days before. For no reason. It could only muster a third of a full charge on the battery at the most. We had very little electricity and there was nothing we could do about it. The generator is barely three years old. It should be doing better, but it is not.

Our truck has two threadbare tires that are barely eight months old and two very worn ones that are five months old.
These are just two of the vital resources that are challenged now, but there are numerous other important things that are not working: the gas generator, RV heater (our backup “go to” in freezing cold weather) and more.

The cat food for health issues that my cats desperately need is not coming in to the store in Taos I have to drive an hour and a half to get. Special ordered it weeks ago. Gee, they’re sorry, they say. I cannot just sub in food from Walmart – a mere hour’s drive away- because the one cat’s digestive system will just shut down if he doesn’t get the specialty food. The only place that has it is a 6 hr roundtrip drive.
I do the drive. On the threadbare tires. That held up, by the grace of God.

Virtually every aspect of my husband’s and my life is disrupted. The solutions to essential problems like getting food; anything (!) involving plumbing (we have none); driving – we must drive a minimum of an hour to get anything, except gas, when the place in town has it; heating; laundry – all of it is disrupted and solutions, that sometimes seem impossible, must be found. How can I get my cats food when the young truck keeps going through tires like tanks of gas and sometimes, like this past Fall, stops working altogether?

The Earth is shifting. The matrix we live in – which is the only reality to the majority of people on Earth – will disappear. I do not know when or how the entire shift will happen, but I know it is underway and will not only become more obvious, but will be all-inclusive. Everyone will feel it.

Like everything, people will experience it differently, but there will be a point when everyone will be affected. The old will not be available in the same way.
I am affected now, but I know others who are not as affected or even nearly so. But I do not see how that can remain when the deeper aspects of the shift materialize.

While there is a collective aspect to this life we are living, the journey is always an individual one first and foremost. My soul has its own reasons for putting me through what I am going through. However, I do wonder if part of the reason for this spiritual bootcamp experience in which I am immersed is so I can be a friend, one who has ” been there, ” to others when the ground starts to shift underneath their feet. It is a radically different way to live. It is cool because you must be creative on virtually every level of your being. There is no guide book. But it would be more fun if doing it didn’t suck so much of the time. Ha. Spirit’s sense of humor. It’s having a good laugh.

What will our hero do now?

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I have not written much the last few months because I haven’t had much to say. There is so much shifting going on – for all of us, no? – that I feel like anything I write pertains to something in the past and I do not yet know what to say about the reality to come.

Here on the Mesa, in the Alchemical Bootcamp, the challenges just keep on coming! Too many to mention, but they seem to permeate many aspects of life infrastructure from food to toilet-ing to climate control. It is bloody cold in this part of the US and we did not weather the winter here last year- we were stuffed in the RV in a couple different places in New Mexico- so we do not know if our infrastructure here on the Mesa is up to the task.

Our RV is not very viable at the moment, b/c unexpected issues with the “baby” vehicle, our truck, sucked up all the resources we hoped to use on the RV. Both the RV and the truck are young machines and my hope was that their “youth” would provide some buffer against repair expenses and inconvenience. Not to be.

So I stare down the prospect of intense cold without the knowledge of how I will survive it. I feel like a Marvel character in this life: how will our hero survive this?

Most people, including me alot of the time, think the real struggle is between me and the elements, between me and the unknown. To be fair, I do feel struggle, so that part feels real, but the struggle is with fear and fearful states of ego/mind. All of this – all of what I am going through- is about lessening the impact of fear on my sense of self, decisions and life. If you look closely, you might see fear at the root of just about every decision and ideation you experience. It might be masked by “socially acceptable,” but underneath it all, it is likely fear. Even if it seems 8 billion other humans accept the fear as real, it does not make it so. Only you decide what you will accept.

Humanity’s Request

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In our galaxy, there is a Galactic Senate. It has 300,000 members and humans of Earth are not on it.
We are not on it, because we have not shown we are worthy of being in this Senate. Let me be clear, by “worthy” I mean, we have not shown we are spiritually-advanced enough to be selected.
But the truth is we are spiritually-advanced enough, we just need to demonstrate it. We need to stop fighting, hating and letting lower frequencies and the “bad actors” that use them control our thoughts, emotions and behaviors. We ARE ready for this. Let’s show it.

Here is a statement some folks created this weekend to present to the Galactic Senate:

“We respectfully request representation based upon our unique experience and diversity.
We, as the sovereign human, express a blueprint as spirit in form, to demonstrate love, wisdom, courage and the integrity to evolve beyond the cosmos. We are ready!”

Make is so, people. Make it so.

The Breakup

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Y’know how in a relationship you have all this interest and belief in the other person and maybe you’re even madly in love with them.
But if any of those things shift, especially if you have no interest or belief in them, then the relationship falls apart?

This is a good analogy for what I am experiencing with the current reality. And truth is, I’ve been experiencing major disaffection for years.

But it’s like a big breakup. I see friends, some of whom know….know….there’s more than the muggle 3D (or allegedly now 4D- seems awfully similar) reality, but they still want something from the 3/4D experience. They still want some experience from it, so they live in it with harmony.
I guess a small part of that is still true for me or I would no longer be in this matrix, though what I’m painfully aware of most of the time is that I want it to shift. Out of existence.
So I’m in it, by a thread, waiting for my real love to arrive. Then I want to welcome that beloved in and tell you how – it’s yours too – it’s better than the deadbeat we had to break up with.
You’re probably not going to see that at first, but eventually you will. Then you’ll be like ” what was I thinking?” And I’ll say to you, “You were brainwashed to think that reality was THE shit and the only game in town. Now you know alot more and you can make different (better) choices.”

The Good Emergency

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I came here for the Good Emergency. This is what I call the scenario where the Earth shift is not only happening, but it is obvious. The shift is happening now, but the real nature of it is not obvious, visible and known by all.

Emergencies are almost always bad. They involve an accident, injury, some sort of catastrophe. But what if we extract that part of it and look at some of the other dynamics that pop out in an emergency. What if we imagine a Good Emergency?

If we exclude the painful aspect, what are some of the hallmarks of an emergency ?

1. Everyone who is involved knows it is happening.
2. The nature of time changes: we don’t feel like we have a lot of it & we don’t think much about it because we are too busy just acting.
3. We just act. Whatever thoughts we have are utilitarian, we do not waste time on excess thought. We do not analyze unduly.
4. We are completely immersed. We are not living life from an armchair, literally or figuratively.
5. Our resistances disappear.
6. What (and often “who”) we think we need changes radically.
7. We don’t judge others and stand apart. We act together.

Right now in our collective reality- I speak from inside the US, though the shift is occurring on the whole planet- there is enough of a fabric of familiarity (and comfort) that people are still standing back expecting the old reality to perform for them, to come back the way it used to be.

Personal & collective materialism, “looksism” (judging people by how they look physically), petty judging and infighting, fear, violence, labeling and standing apart from others is rampant.

We are a planet that has been colonized by off-planet cultures and most humans are still acting like “subjects” of their colonizers. They are seeing some of the effects of colonization- like racism – as the cause. Once racism was brought here it became its own cause, for sure, but it did not originate here. It is important to know this because it is important, vitally important, that the human race start acting like who they really are and not like colonial subjects.

Your gift as a human is that you create your reality from within yourself. No matter how much it looks like you don’t or how difficult it may be to accept because of what you have experienced, it is still the fact. It is cosmic law. This power is being forced into our awareness and into practical existence by the intense squeeze in our world right now. We are being pushed to the brink of existence – food, fuel, water all being messed with. The purpose of it is to shift the age-old habitual focus we put outside ourselves to inside ourselves and discover (rediscover) our limitless ability to create in the physical world.

We are divine spirit living in flesh. We are spirit first and always. We have souls and they belong to each one of us (this is a bigger deal than you might think). We are sovereign through and through. Nobody gives us that and no one can take it away.

I know it doesn’t seem that way, but that’s the puzzle here on Earth and it must be solved. Humans must know who they really are and that they are “that” in equal measure. Each human has the divine spark and no one can be more “Divine” than another “Divine” being. (Yeah, even with those fabulous jeans and shoes y’got on and they ARE divine!)

At some point soon, we are all going to get that a shift is happening. We won’t think or debate about it, it will be “game on.”
We will work together. We will adjust (radically) what we think we need. We will melt stand-apart differentness and resistance.

If this shift is analagous to your first time flying in a plane (hard to imagine, but go ahead, imagine), we must stop standing outside pondering what the plane is, whether it is safe to get in. The Good Emergency will do that. We will board the plane. Our hearts and minds finally open like flowers for we must master flight.
And our pilots? Many will be the “lambs” – those kinda kooky, maybe quiet people we might have thought didn’t know a whole lot, had weird ideas and not much value. We will rethink that, in a nanosecond, because we will be in the Good Emergency and they will know how to get us through. It will be as obvious as the light of day.

Spiritual Destruction

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We are in times of change here on planet Earth. We are actually behind the times, so everything that is happening now is overdue. Yet, alot of it feels pretty sucky. I understand. If you’re read some of my blog posts about my current life circumstances – have I mentioned the composting toilet yet? – you will know I understand.

What few people have yet to understand is that if the rug is pulled out from your life – it can take many forms – your soul is throwing down the gauntlet to the human “you.” (“Throwing down that gauntlet”: to challenge or confront someone). It is challenging you to grow beyond what was comfortable and known. Yes, it feels uncomfortable and maybe terrifying, but it is about your growth and you do not have to know what that growth will look like.
I’ve said it many times: comfort is nice. I’m a big fan. But it is not the goal of life. It is not a sign that you are a good person, living a good life. Ultimately, it is a state of mind and our challenge is to live beyond mind states and in the naked belly of Reality.

The soul is causal, it is creative, so it’s not a stroke of bad luck or punishment if the rug gets pulled out from your life. I understand it probably feels that way and I understand that many…many….people around you and in the media (for example, if you experienced a large scale weather disaster and there is media coverage) may frame it that way, but that’s just a frame, it is not reality and here is the key: it’s all in the frame. That’s the most important point: it’s all in the frame and your state of mind.

You grieve what you feel you’ve lost and at the same time you ask yourself: what will I do now, this moment, this next moment. You get on with it. And you find comfort and pleasure each day however you can, realizing that it is not the goal of your life. It’s not. Growth is. No matter what.

New times are coming and I suspect they will be marvelous, but they require us to get out of our comfort zones. So-called comfort zones are internal, first, then we attach those mind states (the feelings, the images) to circumstances. If your circumstances have shifted radically and quickly – congratulations, you are being called to grow intensely. You are ahead of the curve.

You have accepted the challenge. Now, you must rise to it. You’re up for it. You’ve got this.

Why am I afraid of my power? (Part 1 – also known as “Am I levitating yet?”)

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I am studying the practical application of the Siddhis. I would like to study them, is more the truth. I am finding it difficult to get current, useful, enlightened information on their practical use. Instead I am wading through religious gobbledygook that is familiar muck.
I bought a book called “Beyond the Siddhis,” hoping it would offer practical suggestions for using the siddhis in every day life. While reading the first chapter, I was reminded of a bias I have encountered many times: that the “powers” attributed to the siddhis are, essentially unspiritual. They are impediments on the path to enlightenment and union with life.

I have heard that alot in my life and took it to heart. The result: tons of confusion, self-doubt and a desire to conform (which I mostly failed). I distrusted myself and, to some degree, it inhibited me from developing higher-order capabilities, choosing instead to be tethered, out of fear, to existing ways of navigating reality.

If I give Patanjali the benefit of the doubt, I would say he said these things to warn individuals against getting lost in any ego-based or “glamour” element of the siddhis. This applies to some people (and many institutions), but I am not one of them. If it applies to you, then by all means do the necessary inner work to release any sense of powerlessness and illusion that would make you seek power over others as a substitute for real power, which does not include power “over” anyone or thing and, further, does not even include an “other.” Power dwells within you, which I will get to in another post on this subject.

With all the warnings and shaming in the texts about developing siddhis, I also see classic brainwashing at work. Humans have been taught for millennia to doubt their own inner experience and any abilities that could be considered “super” by the existing institutions, including all religious orders. Those of us with a sincere desire for spiritual evolution have gotten alot of goop on our hands in this quest.

The thought sequence behind this post went something like: Institutions are crumbling. They are supposed to, because an unprecedented Earth is emerging. It will be beyond-beautiful. It will be beyond-belief. It will be the impossible dream come true. But…it’s not that now. This crumbling of existing institutions may get more intense. That wouldn’t feel like the big problem it does if something new and better emerged concomitantly (“something that naturally accompanies or follows something”). But that isn’t happening, at least not on a large scale. So these days, life can feel like hanging on to a ship that is cracked and taking on water.

It’s time to awaken those inner powers and use them in everyday life. ( Everyday Siddhis. Maybe there’s a book in that?) Soon, the old ways will not work and we need a clue about what will work.

The Siddhis are abilities that operate on a quantum scale. Time and space are local AND non-local. Not a problem. When does it seem to be a problem? When we take a so-called Newtownian thought/reality box and try to squeeze it in there. That, my friends, is the only problem.

Invisibility (masslessness), levitation, clair-sensory (inner hearing, seeing), remote viewing, bi-locating – are not only possible, but necessary in a quantum world and on a planet that has finally evolved spiritually and become a peaceful member & player in its own galaxy and other galaxies.

If you are to pull what you need into your own physical reality – whatever density you’re in – and y’don’t have the old institutions anymore (which are really, when you boil it down, just “ways of doing things” with a bunch of fancy names, a ton of collective agreement and fake orders of importance attached to them) then what are you to do?

How am I freaky? Let me count the ways…

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Here are just a few of the ways I diverge from the norm. Keeping the faith that these things are possible requires encouragement because the weight of the norm-beliefs feels heavy:

– Our God-given DNA – not the manipulated ape&hive-mix we got handed down – the one Creator gave us, what some call the Adamic DNA, allows for no aging, sickness and has physical immortality as a given. I pray the tribal, approval-seeking scourge that seems to be part of our current make-up is another errant code and disappears when the true junk DNA (not what the scientists call junk DNA) dissolves or at least goes way, way in the background

– We can cohere matter from ether or non-matter with our magnificent consciousness. Nothing added. We got everything we need. Until that power is activated, those of us who are creatives and have no interest in “how to be an entrepreneur” can navigate the work-in-the-world category and make good money in a profoundly different way.

– We can do everything beyond the speed of light. I heard Steven Spielberg talk about ET’s on a talk show last night. He knows more than he said. In the interview he played it mostly safe, but did say a bit more than classic safe-talk. Some of the people in his movie “Close Encounters” were dialed-in UFO experts. He said he didn’t believe ET’s could travel from 400 million miles away, but I bet he does. The speed of light is slow and the belief that it is the only way matter can travel is absurd and more bad trickery.

Science is created by humans. Humans have limitations and hidden agendas. Do the math.

– The real zero point is within. Anything zero-point technology can do “externally,” the human can do internally through consciousness, intention and spirit.