Category Archives: Consciousness

The One Where God is Part of the Matrix

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Some TV show used to title their episodes this way. It might have been “Friends.”
I am digging deep into new material and contemplations. The big one is that God is part of the matrix. A big one, that.
It makes sense. How can we be fully sovereign beings and also be created by any entity? Be its child? It gives us permanent, existential “child” status.

I watch waves of terror erupt inside me at this thought. I am it. I am the one I’ve been waiting for. Both my venerated spiritual teachers have said this for years. Today I panic at that idea. And I watch myself grasp for something “other” to depend on, lean on. I KNOW I am not alone in this. Somehow that is a comfort, though in the grand scheme it matters not at all.

Today, I will take what comfort I can find without reinstating God or any God-like construct in my consciousness and life. The only thing that is changing is my thought about reality, not the underlying reality itself. Small comfort today as I panic.

Sending love.

More on The Good Emergency: Earth in Transition

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One of my favorite quotes from the last year came from an interview with Sophie Gregoire Trudeau, the ex-wife of Canadian Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau. When asked what her younger self thought about her future, she responded, “I don’t make many plans. I’ve trained my brain to deal with uncertainty more. The brain doesn’t like uncertainty. Stress is a dysfunctional relationship with the present moment.”

I relate well to her words as I have had to examine my relationship to the unknown more than I would have predicted or liked the last two years.

When the rug got pulled from my old life in 2019-2020, I ventured into deeply new inner and outer territory. What drove me was an inner knowing that everything on planet Earth was going to change profoundly.

When the sudden changes came in my own life, I knew it was time for a radical departure from the known world into a life that would – hopefully – be a bridge to the unprecedented reality about to unfold on Earth.

The Earth itself has ascended to the 5th Dimension. Humanity is living in a transition version of the old 3rd dimensional world we all know and (many) think is the only reality that exists….in the entire Cosmos! We have been taught to believe that.

Each density or dimension has very different characteristics, somewhat like different countries having very different customs, language, geography, etc. The change from our old 3rd dimension to the 5th dimension will be radical because the 5th has its own structure (much bigger than 3rd), laws, physics and relationship to duality and it bears no resemblance to our old 3D world.

The other striking thing about this transition from 3D to 5D will be the complete falling away of the system of control that has taken root on our planet for many years. This system of control shapes almost everything we experience in our lives. Just this one fact, the absence of it, will dramatically change our world as we know it. Add to that the ascension into higher dimensions and you have the unprecedented world we are moving into. It is a great time for each of us to challenge our relationship to the unknown and make it more relaxed. We will need that skill. It may seem like the changes I’m talking about will take hundreds of years, but they will not. They will take mere months and years.

It is hard to know exactly what the transition will look like. I would say, though hopefully not to confuse anyone, that in some ways and only in some ways, the lockdown of the pandemic in 2020 was a primer. It was a primer in that almost everything in our world shifted immediately. Everyone had to turn on a dime. This was an incredibly valuable experience. It taught us that the reality we have been lead to believe was absolute and immutable can change in an instant.

Things on Earth will change, but this time we will not be going back to “normal.” This fact might feel very jarring to some. It might feel like an emergency.

Conventionally we experience an emergency when: 1) something sudden and painful is happening; 2) there is usually some form of destruction and we mobilize (like crazy) to eliminate the pain and return to normal, even if that process takes years.

If you extract the painful part and the focus on returning to normal (the two are often very connected), we can call an emergency “good” as there are admirable qualities an emergency brings out. Here are some:

1. Everyone involved knows it is happening (this is key).

2. Time changes. We don’t think much about it because we are too busy acting.

3. We just act. Our thoughts become utilitarian, we do not have time to overanalyze (or snipe on social media or do much of anything on social media, especially if it no longer exists!). We are completely immersed in the process.

4. Our resistance lessens or disappears. There is simply no time for it.

5. What we think we need changes radically.

6. We don’t stand around judging others. We act together.

As our world shifts, you can see how these qualities will be essential. I do not think digital anything is active in the 5th dimension, but there will likely be a transition from our insane dependence on it now to its disappearance. As the transition really gets underway, people will likely be acting in-person in more local communities (will be radically new for younger people).

The old world will not be returning. There will be no “normal” to go back to. It will seem scary for awhile. Time to bring in your better relationship to the unknown. It might feel like an emergency, but it is a good, a great emergency.

We will all be a crucial part of a magnificent transformation. It will have positive reverberations for our entire Universe, which we have yet to meet! There will be great celebration in the cosmos as humanity is freed from the controlling entities and systems that have held it in bondage for ages and the Earth and its inhabitants ascend into spiritual greatness and take their rightful place as fully free cosmic citizens.

Are you ready to rock and roll? We got this!

Why Didn’t This All Shift in 1958?

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I have had two major storms of knowledge about imminent radical change on Earth. Each one guided or accompanied major changes in my life.

In both cases, especially the first which started in 1990 and continued in one form or another until around 1996, the change shown to me was definitely right on the verge. It oozed from my pores. I had a spiritually-oriented therapist at the time who told me humans on Earth would never (never!) communicate telepathically. I thought to myself, “That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. They will do so and soon.” I knew it in my bones, my soul, my DNA. I came into this life to usher in this new Earth and finally the shift of all man-made systems, the ecosystems, consciousness and physics was underway.

And then it didn’t happen.

In 2020, new downloads unfurled. The rug got pulled from our life – all part of the unfoldment I thought – and then….it didn’t happen. Again. By now, I have a bit of a complex. I do not necessarily think my intuition has been wrong, but that the plan for the unfoldment changes, maybe daily.

In the book “Return of the Dove,” by Margaret Storm, the author is absolutely positive the shifts on Earth, which she groups under the umbrella term of The Aquarian Age, are just weeks away. She had very sold intel, from spiritual masters. That was 1958.

Curiously, alot of Ms. Storm’s info, much of it from the likes of sources like ascended master St. Germain, were very similar to the reports from YouTube influencer and Galactic Federation emissary, Elena Danaan, about events that took place in late 2021 both on and off-planet.

They both spoke of the clearing out of all off-planet controllers from our solar system. Elena reported these events in detail in December 2021. Separated by 63 years, they both claimed the remaining problems on Earth were the result of the minions of the off-planet instigators that were still in embodiment on Earth.

How can this be? Margaret Storm wrote about the vast changes happening “soon” and since some of the historical periods she described encompassed millions of years, at first I didn’t know what “soon” was to her? Maybe it was hundreds of years. Then towards the end of the book, though, she names it: weeks. The changes were just weeks away.

I think she was right. It probably was weeks away. It probably had been imminent many years before her time and has been imminent many times since.

Her book is full of precious nuggets of spiritual gold, so it was a delight to read her book regardless of accuracy. Since I’ve been in her position at least two times myself – I could have written a book declaring “Earth changes imminent!” thirty-three years ago – I felt comforted that I was not alone having had a glorious vision, trusting it, shifting my life to ready for it and then living in the wasteland of the aftermath of it not unfolding. She did not write about the aftermath part of her life, but if she lived beyond the publishing of the book, she most certainly lived it.

Divine Presence is Yours

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I will get back to the post about planets and planes, which is really about off-planet reality, but also about the opportunity for freedom from old perceptual filters – not yet considered old by the collective reality – that learning about the Old World facts and manipulation of our world system offers us. Freeing ourselves from binding perceptual filters is a vital step in spiritual advancement. Spiritual advancement is what this blog is about. It is what life is about.

You have within you a divine flame. A divine presence. It is not abstract, it is as real as the nose on your face. In fact it likely created the nose on your face.

Divine presence can do anything. It can have complete dominion over the physical world. Connecting with it is a spiritual practice and “dominion” – as controlling as the word might sound – is a spiritual act. Therefore keep up with your spiritual truth inquiry and seeking. It is the foundation for the greater powers of Divine Presence in your world.

The term “occult” suggests those who seek the power of the Divine without the necessary wisdom or because they are too lazy to do the spiritual work. I kinda get that though I have never been drawn to that path.

The reason I get why someone might want a shortcut is because the spiritual path can feel downright hard at times. Hopeless, lonely. And not for just a short time.
But it doesn’t matter. We’re playing the long (LONG 🤔) game.
Keep on. Spirit is the only true power. I have spent my entire life searching for the whole package – the spiritual truth, freedom and the dominion over the physical and energetic worlds. I keep on. You keep on. There is no other way.

Off-Planet- The Spiritual Tech is Everywhere

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I have been opening my mind and research into theories of Mudfloods and Resets lately. Even with all the unconventional material I’ve accepted over the years, some of the details of this FAR-reaching story are tough to accept.

The subject matter in this interview with Norman Dodd is some of the more unsettling but only because of the facts it describes. Those facts are disturbing and yet they present us with a powerful opportunity to set ourselves free.
The beauty of learning about some of the actual history of this planet is that it allows us to free ourselves of layers of perceptual filters that bind us. Even if we have been emotionally fond of them, we can work with those feelings and at the same time free our minds and souls.

I was going to write this post about the “Earth is a plane” theory I have encountered researching the Reset theories. I do not resonate with it. Consequently, I live on a planet. Never thought I’d have to qualify that belief, but that is what I am doing. So I have established that.
More later.

Bad Fiction

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Lord have mercy. I am working on an old iMac and it is so slow I want to pull my hair out. There is a widespread machine failure, dysfunction going on in my life. My laptop dying last Fall was part of that wave. That wave has been active for over a year now. Wow.
God love my friend Susan for giving me her 2103 iMac so I could type on something, but bless it, it is slow.
What does this ongoing wave of machine failure mean?

To be honest, I do not know with any certainty. I must admit, recently, after the brand new solar system completely failed and died, for a moment I felt like I was being targeted, like energetically, but that passed. I must stay out of that kind of thinking. It is useless and puts me in twisted “inner” territory. Mostly I feel abandoned by God and snubbed by my soul. Since I see my soul as the causal factor in my life, feeling snubbed by it is a problem. There are so many crazymaking aspects to this time in my life, feeling at odds or victimized by my soul is just one of them. It’s not as serious as it sounds meaning I do ultimately trust my soul, but I am leary of its messaging at the moment. (Ha).

I have alot to say today after having little for months. I will probably break it up into different posts. I will (try to) go back to some of the challenges of this in-between time. The time between worlds.

Machines are breaking. As I’ve said in many posts, everything on this planet, in our world will change down to the last blade of grass. When I first heard my teacher say that it hit home because I knew it. I knew it intuitively, with all my cells. It is the truth within me. The “what” of what will change has been a 50 yr educational process with some of the more difficult, sickening details of it only becoming clear or clearer the last 3-4 years. That’s where the bad fiction comes in. Thirty years ago I wrote: “This world is all fiction. Unfortunately it is bad fiction.” If you are going to create a world of duality and form, why not make it a pleasant world. Just like if you are going to write a story, why not make it a happy one? Especially when that story is a reality people live in. Yes, duality can suck, but it doesn’t have to suck the way it does in our world at the moment.

OK back to the dying machines. Everything will change, so machines will change too. My intuition tells me none of the machines we currently use will exist in the ascended Earth. It is a completely different field of consciousness, physics and form (hallelujah). So as this world dismantles, things will start to not work or maybe disappear…or both!

How much of my current life is a product of the dismantling of this existing reality? Not sure. If it were up to me we’d move quickly and smoothly from one dimensional world to the next, but instead there is this insanely long in-between time going on.
Perhaps in the grand scheme of things it is merciful, but to me it is not. So there is this long in-between time when you …I’ll speak for myself here, when I have to live in this world when I’m beyond (!) ready for the 5D one, but I still depend on the current world’s machines, economy, infrastructure, vehicles, much of which have been failing. The worst of it is that it feels scary. And yes, I admit that if I boil down that fear it is not only a fear of death or disability, but even, as I heard someone say recently, the soul fearing its own annihilation. I didn’t know souls did that, but I trust the source and I know that the worst of what I’m feeling when things fall apart is a kind of terror.

It is an Unprecendented Earth After All

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As for the Earth we are bringing in. It is not a reset, a recreation, a renewal, new Yuga. No more “re” anything. No more Yugas here.

It is: unprecedented, multi-dimensional, ascended. New. Never before.

Time to shed all history, borrowed ideas, identities and attachments, which are possibly 100% of what we currently experience or close to it.

Real Freedom

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The real freedom is within. Nothing….no thing….in the apparent external world has to change for you to be utterly, completely free right this moment. But something internal has to. The internal reality most of us experience is “apparent” too, but not to me…not yet.

Recently I was talking with a friend about ascension. There are aspects I probably cannot articulate yet, but I have known for a long time that part of the process is that the soul releases its identification with form. That does not means we die. We are so trained to equate form with physical life, but that’s part of the problem. The spiritual release and dropping the identification of form (which is so much more than the physical body) is an act of soul and consciousness. It sounds airy-fairy and unrelated to the nuts and bolts of life, but it is neither. It IS profoundly practical and just profound overall.

I longed for this state for most of my life. I studied it. If anyone who experienced it wrote about it, I read it their accounts. I used to be a walking encyclopedia of written spiritual accounts of humans who had awakened to non-duality, soul freedom, ascension. After decades of inquiry, I concluded the shift is an act of grace. If fervor, longing, sincere desire, intuitive knowing, etc., could cause this state, I would have experienced it many times over. I can’t say that none of that matters, because maybe it does and it doesn’t matter anyway because once you have a taste for it, you cannot let it go and you long for that freedom. We long for it because we know it is our true state. But what pulls the final lever of awakening? It seems to be the soul. The human cannot cause it.

I do Zoom calls with Byron Katie almost every week and have done so for over four year. BK is an awakened human. She does not describe herself that way, which is all the more telling of her authenticity, so these are my words and my experience of her. She too has said that her “experience on the floor” (see any of her books to know how she woke up on the floor one morning and nothing was the same) was an act of grace.

Disrupting

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The solar generator suddenly started taking in half of what it is supposed to and half of what it was taking in just days before. For no reason. It could only muster a third of a full charge on the battery at the most. We had very little electricity and there was nothing we could do about it. The generator is barely three years old. It should be doing better, but it is not.

Our truck has two threadbare tires that are barely eight months old and two very worn ones that are five months old.
These are just two of the vital resources that are challenged now, but there are numerous other important things that are not working: the gas generator, RV heater (our backup “go to” in freezing cold weather) and more.

The cat food for health issues that my cats desperately need is not coming in to the store in Taos I have to drive an hour and a half to get. Special ordered it weeks ago. Gee, they’re sorry, they say. I cannot just sub in food from Walmart – a mere hour’s drive away- because the one cat’s digestive system will just shut down if he doesn’t get the specialty food. The only place that has it is a 6 hr roundtrip drive.
I do the drive. On the threadbare tires. That held up, by the grace of God.

Virtually every aspect of my husband’s and my life is disrupted. The solutions to essential problems like getting food; anything (!) involving plumbing (we have none); driving – we must drive a minimum of an hour to get anything, except gas, when the place in town has it; heating; laundry – all of it is disrupted and solutions, that sometimes seem impossible, must be found. How can I get my cats food when the young truck keeps going through tires like tanks of gas and sometimes, like this past Fall, stops working altogether?

The Earth is shifting. The matrix we live in – which is the only reality to the majority of people on Earth – will disappear. I do not know when or how the entire shift will happen, but I know it is underway and will not only become more obvious, but will be all-inclusive. Everyone will feel it.

Like everything, people will experience it differently, but there will be a point when everyone will be affected. The old will not be available in the same way.
I am affected now, but I know others who are not as affected or even nearly so. But I do not see how that can remain when the deeper aspects of the shift materialize.

While there is a collective aspect to this life we are living, the journey is always an individual one first and foremost. My soul has its own reasons for putting me through what I am going through. However, I do wonder if part of the reason for this spiritual bootcamp experience in which I am immersed is so I can be a friend, one who has ” been there, ” to others when the ground starts to shift underneath their feet. It is a radically different way to live. It is cool because you must be creative on virtually every level of your being. There is no guide book. But it would be more fun if doing it didn’t suck so much of the time. Ha. Spirit’s sense of humor. It’s having a good laugh.